Areas Of Gray
by Pam Marks and Baby Kitty
Summary: Had to reload this story....left out a very important thanks to someone very important


**Disclaimer:** I'm evil but the Power Rangers are not mine. I don't claim that they are so read at your own risk  
**Authors Note:** I am pissed off so I had to vent so thus I wrote. This is the product of that.

**Special Thanks:** A special thanks goes out to our beta reader who grasiously took the time to look over this story and edit it for us even though she hates first person pov thank you Amber aka Bhotanni. Sorry about posting this part with out this special thanks to you in it before you are a very important piece of the story. Thank you for all your hard work.

**Areas Of Gray**

I set my briefcase down by the door, barely registering the sigh that escapes my mouth. My hands automatically loosen the tie around my neck as I walk farther into the cool house. "Tommy!" Calling for the man in red, I wait for him to come bouncing down the stairs to tell me about his day.

Met with silence, I'm reminded that Tommy no longer lives here. A torrent of memories rush through me of years gone by. _How could I have let him slip through my fingers? Why was I so obsessed with making a better world? Why couldn't I be obsessed with him and what we had? Why did I not listen to him when he told me to stop? Why was I so stupid? When did my obsession turn into madness?_

My course is set upon the study; more specifically, a certain locked away photograph contained within a disguised safe manufactured to look like a regular stack of books. Once the safe is open, I take out the silver framed photograph of my love. Tracing his long locks and smiling face in the picture, I swallow hard before I shut my eyes. _Why?_ The question burns in my soul. His smile no longer reaches me, and now all I am to him is a monster to be destroyed. Now he is a Power Ranger once again. And on one occasion told me there are no gray areas in a Ranger's life; there simply can't be. He must do what his Rangering has taught him to do; slay the monster that I have become.

After my son told me about his favorite teacher, I showed up at the Cyber Café in the hopes of catching a glimpse of the man I foolishly lost. The look in his eyes told me everything I needed to know; he will kill me. What once was will never be again. For him, there are no gray areas. His heart and soul is that of a Ranger, whereas my soul is the very embodiment of evil; therefore, I must die.

A remorseful sigh escapes as I set his picture down on the table beside the whiskey decanter. Haphazardly I pour a glass of the bronze liquor and quickly knock back the contents. I relax into the leather chair at my desk and pick up the silver frame. Memories of the day the photo was taken drift back into my consciousness. To a time before my obsession turned to madness, before the island, the fighting, the hurt and the betrayal. To a time before I smacked him. The memory of the first and only time I have ever hit him brings my mind to a halt. He just wanted me to stop. His desire wasn't to kill me but by then, it was too late to save any part of my soul. The force of that blow sent him to the ground of the gem bay. In that moment, I became the monster in his eyes. That's when he knew it was too late. _He_ was too late. He had to do what he had to do.

The monster within me wants Tommy, I know he does. I can feel it whenever he's near my saint. He wanted him the day Tommy blew up the compound prompting his disappearance from the face of the Earth. His need of him stems not from his abilities with technical equipment and research. I felt his desire for my love when he had him strapped down to the table trying to extort the information necessary to release the black gem. If it were possible, I would have died rather than let the monster lay even one clawed hand on my saint; but it was too late for me. Any form of control over that beast which resides within washed away long ago.

I pour another glass of whiskey, polishing it off as quickly as the first before replacing the stop on the decorated glass container. My reflection gazes back at me in the mirrored glass of the decanter. set's tray. It is too late for Tommy and I to have any more of the precious memories from this photograph. I destroyed it with my greed and my hunger. It died on the floor of the gem bay when I struck Tommy sealing my path as the monster my love, my saint sees me at.

Replacing the picture in its secret place, I lean my head on the bookshelf and remind myself that I am a monster. Tommy is a Power Ranger that must kill me and has vowed to do so more than once. There can be no gray areas.

To be continued...


End file.
